Robin & HeatherSheer Panic & Denial
Long-term couples often build a codependent relationship after a few years.
The emotional stages of divorce and even uncoupling start with denial. Breaking off that arrangement can be devastating. You freeze into a state of denial where you can’t fathom a life without your ex. During this time, you’re unable to consider the next steps of your life.
Despite popular belief, you should not suppress these feelings. Otherwise, you risk becoming bitter and pessimistic.
Use this stage to cope with the trauma but prevent it from breaking your self-esteem or mental health.
Unexpected Anger
Whether you were married or in a committed relationship, separation can trigger anger. All the negativity surrounding your relationship will boil over as you recall mistakes, conflicts, and insults.
Despite popular belief, you should not suppress these feelings. Otherwise, you risk becoming bitter and pessimistic.
Power through this phase by using anger as a tool to purge the negativity. You can do this via emotional journaling or having a heart-to-heart with a confidant.
…there is no harm in grieving over lost companionship. Remember to have a good cry out and then treat yourself with a self-care package.
Backtracking/Compromise
Midway after your separation, you will have a fleeting moment when you view life with your ex with rose-tinted glasses. You are willing to compromise your self-esteem to return to the ‘good old days’. Your emotional stage moves from anger to nostalgia.
This phase makes a frequent appearance for people who fail to move on in life after divorce/separation.
The Debilitating Depression
Depression soon joins the party when loneliness and anxiety become your life-long companions. When that happens, you start disengaging from social responsibilities. You may have difficulty completing everyday tasks and can spend hours in bed.
Never let this emotional stage of divorce consume your life. Find the courage to keep moving forward with the right support. You can also seek professional advice like uncoupling counseling or talk it out with loved ones.
That said, there is no harm in grieving over lost companionship. Remember to have a good cry out and then treat yourself with a self-care package.
Acceptance & Relief
The ‘this too shall pass’ phase emerges after you have given yourself time to heal. You will come to realize that life after divorce is not as intimidating as you assumed. The newfound independence gives you clarity and opens endless possibilities for your professional and personal life.
Focus on personal development goals by pursuing your dreams or engaging in your favorite activities.
The Bottom Line
In the end, everyone’s journey is different. Your experiences and emotional turmoil do not follow a timeline or playbook. The only thing that matters is your well-being. There is no shame in feeling overwhelmed in the aftermath of a divorce or separation.
The best thing you can do is indulge in self-care and build a strong support system. Also, never rule out the possibility of a happier future.
Watch this space for more insights and support for uncoupled, separated, and divorced individuals. We are here to help you get your life on track!
Dear CeCe
