Thirty, Flirty and Thriving

Confidence is seen in how we interact with people – and often in our eyes.

Turning 30 used to be the year equated with being old. It was the day single women became spinsters. What outdated thinking! The thirties can be the best time of a person’s life. It’s a great time to be single. The growth curve of your 20’s, brings with it greater opportunities and the ability to thrive in the world you create for yourself.

Top Reasons Your 30’s is better than your 20’s.

People in their 30’s by and large:

Are more confident
Have more disposable income than 20 somethings
Know themselves better including what they like and don’t like – even knowing who they are attracted to and what they want in a relationship
Care less about what people think
Over half are happier at 30 than any younger age
Keep the peak strength they reached at 25 all through their 30’s
Perform better at ultra-sports
Finally have “mature brains” – yep, this doesn’t happen until our 30’s
Are better able to remember faces. Facial recognition peaks at 32
Are at our cognitive best. We are most likely to become a scientific genius during our 30’s

30-year old’s are more confident by far than 20 year old’s. This confidence gives them ability to make better decisions about what they want out of life. This includes being more selective about who they date, focusing more on deeper qualities and caring less about looks.

The Guardian reported that both men and women placed greater significance on openness and trust, as well as caring less about aesthetics and more about personality.

A study of 165,000 participants indicates a step rise in self-esteem and confidence in the ages of 20 to 30.

Psychology Today proposed that between the ages of 20 and 30, individuals take on more complex social roles and responsibilities. Their development is seen to be focused on improvement of personality traits associated with those roles. Taking control of their own reactions and development is essential to developing confidence and resilience as well.

…everyone has flirted at some time or another -whether they’ve called it flirting or not.

Confidence is the key to flirting. Jump back into the fun and excitement and flirt your way into a new heart!

Confidence is sexy. Think of Samantha or Mr. Big from Sex and the City. It was their most obvious trait and drew people to them. Confidence is seen in how we interact with people – and often in our eyes. Almost all flirting begins with eye contact. Think of all those meet-cutes.

Locking eyes and laughing in reaction to something you’ve both witnessed.
Accidentally bumping into each other and keeping eye contact for just a little longer than what is normally comfortable.
A woman staring across the room at an attractive person. They look back, she looks down, look ups and it’s them who is staring now! Kismet!

There is something about prolonged eye contact that makes us feel seen. Feeling seen is the beginning of feeling known and we all respond to that.

Flirting with someone we like and find attractive is instinctual. People in their 30’s are more authentic. Authenticity breeds connection. Mutual attraction and connection leads to natural flirting. Trust yourself and go with the flow. Everyone has flirted at some time or another -whether they’ve called it flirting or not. It can be expressed by vulnerability. Needing help or sharing something personal. Maybe it’s a touch when you lean in to be heard in a loud bar. Vulnerability is present when giving a compliment to a person you don’t know.

Flirting can also be:

Laughter
Whispering
Personal questions, especially about relationship status
Singling someone out in a group for conversation and questions
Flirting is designed to make the person you’re flirting with feel attractive and special, not intimidated
However you flirt, remember that flirting should show your interest in getting to know someone — in a polite, respectful and tactful way.

Summary

Being in your thirties and single lets you explore new interests easily. You have the opportunity to meet more people and have fun without the insecurities of your youth. Have fun. Grow. Be curious. Thrive. Make it the time of your life!