Friends and family can be great at vetting people and offer a bit of security for those first dates.
There are multiple reasons for considering blind dating. It can be time consuming to meet people naturally and hard to trust strangers. Online dating can be useful but can also be intimidating. Friends and family can be great at vetting people and offer a bit of security for those first dates. Here are some items to consider before saying yes to blind dates.
Blind Date Pros and Cons
Pros:
- Meet people who aren’t already in your life
- Convenient and enables you to meet multiple people in a short period of time
- Have fun exploring what you want, even if they are not Mr./Ms. Right
- It can be great fun to meet the friends of your friends
- No pressure, no harm, no foul – if it doesn’t work out no one is hurt
Cons:
- You may spend a few hours being bored and making small talk
- Your blind date may have hopes that don’t match yours
- There will be uncomfortable moments
- Your friend may set you up for something serious when you just want to have fun
Blind Date Dos and Don’ts
Set your expectations low. Don’t expect to meet your soulmate. Communicate with your friends and/or coworkers that you are looking for a friend first. Someone you can have fun with, not an immediate and hot love affair. Discuss with them the things you like in a potential partner.
…communicate with your friends and/or coworkers that you are looking for a friend first; someone you can have fun with, not an immediate and hot love affair.
Ask your friends to share phone numbers and set up a time to have a quick phone call, and/or text conversations prior to the date.
Don’t just meet for dinner/drinks/coffee. Going to a movie first, can supply discussion material after the movie. Meet over an activity. A walk on the beach, golf, tennis or any other activity in a high visibility location. This gives you a chance to talk, flirt, learn about each other’s sportsmanship at the same time as it depressurizes the situation.
First impressions mean so much. Be there on time. Dress appropriately for the venue in clothes that are clean and unwrinkled. Do your best to be calm and in a positive state of mind without expectations. In your own mind, look at this as only a meet and greet with no commitment beyond the meeting.
Turn your phone off and pay attention to the person who has taken the time to meet you. Be curious and use the time to get to know them. Ask open ended questions that let them indirectly tell you who they are. Questions such as:
- What’s your favorite place in the world and why?
- Do you know any good jokes, or tell me the things that make you laugh?
- What’s the best gift you’ve ever given or received?
- What would your perfect day look like?
- What do you like best about your work?
Summary
Blind dating doesn’t have to be a high-pressure situation. It can be fun and rewarding experience. Please share you ideas about blind dating in the comments.
